The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship

Married or not you should read this...


“When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife’s divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind…I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed -dead. My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push through with the divorce.— At least, in the eyes of our son—- I’m a loving husband….

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves.

So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

If you don’t share this, nothing will happen to you.

If you do, you just might save a marriage. Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up

Kisah Menarik Bagaimana Pakar Anatomi Thailand Memeluk Islam

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”Sesungguhnya orang-orang yang kafir kepada ayat-ayat Kami, kelak akan Kami masukkan mereka ke dalam neraka. Setiap kali kulit mereka hangus, Kami ganti kulit mereka dengan kulit yang lain, supaya mereka merasakan azab. Sesungguhnya Allah Maha Kuasa, lagi Maha Bijaksana.” (QS. An-Nisa: 56)
Bagi sebahagian besar umat Islam, ayat di atas terdengar seperti ayat-ayat serupa dalam Al-Quran yang menjelaskan pedihnya siksa neraka bagi orang-orang yang tidak beriman. Namun tidak demikian bagi Tagatat Tejasen, seorang saintis Thailand di bidang anatomi. Baginya, ayat itu adalah sebuah keajaiban.
Persidangan Perubatan Saudi ke-6 di Jeddah yang diikuti Tejasen pada Mac 1981 menjadi awal detik pertemuannya dengan keajaiban itu. Dalam persidangan yang berlangsung selama lima hari itu, sejumlah ilmuan Muslim mendedahkan kepada Tejasen beberapa ayat Al-Quran yang berkaitan dengan anatomi.





Tejasen yang beragama Buddha kemudian mengatakan bahawa agamanya juga mempunyai bukti-bukti sama yang secara tepat menjelaskan tahap-tahap perkembangan embrio. Para ilmuan Islam yang ada ketika itu tertarik mempelajarinya dan meminta profesor yang berasal dari Thailand itu untuk menunjukkan ayat-ayat tersebut kepada mereka.
Setahun kemudian, pada bulan Mei 1982, Tejasen menghadiri persidangan perubatan yang sama di Dammam, Arab Saudi.
Apabila ditanya tentang ayat-ayat anatomi yang pernah dijanjikannya, Tejasen meminta maaf dan mengatakan bahawa ia telah menyampaikan kenyataan tersebut sebelum mempelajarinya. Ia telah memeriksa kitabnya, dan mendapati bahawa tidak ada rujukan di dalamnya yang dapat dijadikan bahan kajian.
Ia kemudian menerima cadangan para ilmuan Muslim untuk membaca sebuah makalah penelitian karya Keith Moore, seorang profesor bidang anatomi yang berasal dari Kanada.
Makalah itu berbicara tentang keserasian antara embriologi moden dengan apa yang disebutkan dalam Al-Quran.
Tejasen tercengang saat membacanya. Sebagai saintis di bidang anatomi, ia menguasai dermatologi (ilmu tentang kulit).
Dalam tinjauan anatomi, lapisan kulit manusia terdiri daripada tiga lapisan yakni Epidermis, Dermis, dan Sub Cutis. Pada lapisan yang terakhirlah, Sub Cutis, terdapat hujung-hujung pembuluh darah dan saraf.
Penemuan moden di bidang anatomi telah mendedahkan bahawa luka bakar yang terlalu dalam akan mematikan saraf-saraf yang menetapkan sensasi.
Saat terjadi Combustio grade III (luka bakar yang telah menembus Sub Cutis), seseorang tidak akan merasakan sakit. Hal itu disebabkan tidak berfungsi hujung-hujung serabut saraf afferent dan efferent pengatur sensasi yang rosak oleh luka bakar tersebut.
Makalah itu tidak saja menunjukkan kejayaan teknologi perubatan dan perkembangan ilmu anatomi, namun juga membuktikan kebenaran Al-Quran.
Ayat 56 surah An-Nisa ‘mengatakan bahawa Allah akan memasukkan orang-orang kafir ke dalam neraka, dan menukar kulit mereka dengan kulit yang baru setiap kali kulit itu hangus terbakar, agar mereka merasakan pedihnya azab Allah.
Jantung Tejasen berdebar. “Bagaimana mungkin Al-Quran yang diturunkan 14 abad yang lalu telah mengetahui fakta perubatan ini?”
Sebelum berjaya mengatasi kejutan tersebut, Tejasen dilempari soalan oleh para ilmuan Muslim yang mendampinginya, “Mungkinkah ayat Al-Quran ini berpunca dari manusia?”
Ketua Jurusan Anatomi Universiti Chiang Mai Thailand itu sentak menjawab, “Tidak, kitab itu tidak mungkin berasal dari manusia. Ia kemudian termangu dan meneruskan respondnya, “Lalu dari mana kiranya Muhammad menerimanya?”
Mereka memberitahu Tejasen bahawa Tuhan itu adalah Allah, yang membuat Tejasen semakin ingin tahu. “Lalu, siapakah Allah itu?” soalnya.
Dari para ilmuan Muslim tersebut, Tejasen mendapatkan keterangan tentang Allah, Sang Pencipta yang dari-Nya berpunca segala kebenaran dan kesempurnaan. Dan Tejasen tak membantah semua jawapan yang diterimanya. Ia menerimanya.
Profesor yang pernah menjadi dekan Fakulti Perubatan Universiti Chiang Mai lalu itu kembali semula ke negaranya, tempat ia menyampaikan sejumlah kuliah tentang pengetahuan dan penemuan barunya itu.
Maklumat yang dikutip oleh laman special.worlofislam.info menyebutkan bahawa kuliah-kuliah profesor yang masih beragama Buddha itu, di luar dugaan, telah mengislamkan lima mahasiswanya.
Hingga akhirnya, pada Persidangan Perubatan Saudi ke-8 yang diadakan di Riyadh, Tejasen kembali hadir dan mengikuti siri pidato tentang bukti-bukti Quran yang berkaitan dengan ilmu perubatan.
Dalam persidangan yang berlangsung selama lima hari itu, Tejasen banyak membincangkan dalil-dalil tersebut bersama para sarjana Islam dan bukan Islam.
Di akhir persidangan, 3 November 1983, Tejasen maju dan berdiri di podium. Di hadapan semua peserta persidangan, ia menceritakan detik awal minatnya pada Al-Quran, juga kekagumannya pada makalah Keith Moore yang membuatnya meyakini kebenaran Islam.
“Segala yang terakam dalam Al-Quran 1400 tahun yang lalu pastilah kebenaran, yang boleh dibuktikan oleh sains. Nabi Muhammad yang tidak boleh membaca dan menulis pastilah menerimanya sebagai cahaya yang diwahyukan oleh Yang Maha Pencipta, “katanya. Tejasen lalu menutup pidatonya dengan mengucap dua kalimah syahadat.
(Sumber: Republika.Co.Id)

KESIMPULAN: SEBENARNYA..AYAT AL QURAN TERSEBUT AKAN MUDAH UNTUK KITA FAHAMI DALAM KONTEKS CERITA INI JIKA KITA MENGAJUKAN PERSOALAN.... KENAPAKAH AYAT TERSEBUT MENGATAKAN "KAMI MENGGANTIKAN KULIT MEREKA DENGAN KULIT YANG LAIN SUPAYA MEREKA MERASAKAN AZAB" ATAU "UNTUK APAKAH TUHAN MENGGANTIKAN KEMBALI KULIT MEREKA".... KERANA APABILA DIGANTIKAN KEMBALI KULIT,  MEREKA AKAN KEMBALI MERASAKAN AZAB YANG MAHA PEDIH....
sesungguhnya Al Quran itu adalah benar dari Tuhan yang SebenarNya...
WALLAHUALAM BISSAWAB.....



sumber: http://www.harian-metro-online.com/kisah-menarik-bagaimana-pakar-anatomi-thailand-memeluk-islam